Thursday, May 24, 2007

“Live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air's salubrity..."

It is absolutely beautiful out today. I could hardly even bear to come to work. When I walked out my front door this morning and felt the warm, gentle air surround me and felt the heat of the sun on my face I felt a desperate longing to be outside. I want nothing more than to get away by myself - either for a long, long walk, or to find a spot and just sit. I have so much to think about, so much to work out. Issues to resolve, forgiveness to find. Sitting in this room, my heart is obsessed with the longing to be out there, in the sun, in a field, by a stream, with God. The really frustrating thing is, only one class comes through here today. One. Look at all the time I have to think. And thinking in here just isn't the same. I'm not free to act/react in the ways that will help me. But outside? The birds are singing, the breeze is gently blowing, the sun is warming up the day. The trees are rustling, the grass smells sweet, the bugs are buzzing....and God is there. I wanna waste time with Him. Not by myself in this lab where my thoughts are constantly interrupted. But out there, with a journal. A book. Maybe music, maybe not. In the stillness. With the breeze. Blue sky. Healing sun. God.

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