Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Changing a Light Bulb the Christian Way

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatic : Only 1 - Hands are already in the air.

Pentecostal : 10 - One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians : None - Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic : None - Candles only.

Baptists : At least 15 - One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken .

Episcopalians: 3 - One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Mormons : 5 - One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians : We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem orcompose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service,in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which areequally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists : Undetermined - Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb,
or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Nazarene: 6 - One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans: None - Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish : - What's a light bulb?

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