Thursday, April 08, 2010

Let it Be

Today I'm feeling angsty, anxious, at loose ends. I can't concentrate on anything. I can't sit still. I can't read. The sun is gone and it's cold out. Which is ok, because it kind of mirrors my mood. Not interested in music. Not interested in being social or talking. I'm agitated. Sleep sounds good - but my brain is whirring too insistently for that. It might help to go to the gym, but I did a pretty intense workout yesterday and my knee hurts. Wow - this is really a downer! But I need to vent somewhere. I was hoping if I started typing something healing would come from it. No such luck.

I'm a fixer. And when I can't fix, I stress. I hurt. I get all fidgity. I eat. Bad, bad. Don't eat. Because then I'll have to spend twice as long at the gym.

I like status quo. And smooth waters. I like things unfolding in an uncomplicated way. The way they are supposed to unfold, or at least the way I think they are supposed to.

The other night on American Idol, Katie Stevens sang Let It Be. I always felt like this was kind of a prayer, positing the ideal, or even just what I wanted, and then praying - please, let it be. But I realized the other night a very different message was there. At least for me. Leave it alone! Things will work out as they should. Have faith. Wait. Wait on God. Let it Be.

So, today, in all my restlesness, the niggling, unsettled craziness of my mind, I find I'm hearing these words:

Let it be,
let it be.
There will be an answer,
let it be.

Let it be,
let it be,
Whisper words of wisdom,
let it be

It's easy to say, hard to do. Thoughts chasing their tails in a frenzy.

Round and round it goes. Hamster on a wheel.

Let it Be.

*graphic -Laurie Coyle Designs

1 comment:

Kelly said...

VERY insightful post, Karedy. I've been thinking the same things lately, too. xoxo